Conisboro’ Conservative Association

Annual Dinner

Humorous Speech by Mr. S. Whitfield

The annual dinner of the Conisborough Conservative Association was held on Tuesday night at the Fox Inn, Conisborough, when there was a large gathering. The dinner served was of the most excellent character, and reflected the highest credit on Mrs. Gibson, the hostess.

After dinner a large and enthusiastic meeting was held, over which Mr. Godfrey Walker, J.P., presided. Mr. S. Whitfield occupied the vice-chair, and there were also present Messrs. J. Dykes (Mexborough), Dr. McCall, H. Waddington (Mexborough), A. Thompson (Mexborough), J. Treacy, F. Clegg (Doncaster), B. H. Sharp, Thos. Barron (Mexborough), Edgar Barron (Mexborough), A. Burniston, J. Woodhouse, T. Saville, W. Crowcroft, H. Baker, C. Wilson, G. Kilner, J. Crossley, C. Radley, F. Kitchen, J. Gillott, W. Barlow, C. Biggins (Mexborough), W. Ward (Swinton), H. V. Potts (Leeds), C. Ledge, L. Peverelli (Doncaster), J. Brownlow, Dr. Jenson, H. Guest, F. Ogley, J. Appleyard, F. Fowles, A. Pinniger, F. Middleton, F. Oxley, W. Appleyard, F. Fisher, H. Piper, W. J. Goodlad, A. Ridgill, T. Goodlad, G. Haigh, R. Fearn, L. Crookes, J. Coleman, W. Martin, W. R. Proctor, W. H. Smith, and W. Boulton.

The usual loyal and patriotic toasts were honoured on the proposition of the Chairman, who made suitable allusion in each case.

Mr. Clegg (Doncaster) proposed “Success to the Conisborough Conservative Association.” After congratulating the Association on the success of that gathering, he proceeded to refer to the situation in the constituency. At the last election they had told Mr. Fleming that he was no good, that he had no interest in the division, and that he would never be of benefit to it, and even their opponents had now found that out. (Laughter.) He thought the real reason why the Radicals were “chucking” Mr. Fleming overboard was because he was not like Jabez—he never brought them “sowt.” (Loud laughter, and a voice: “He has not got it.”) He didn’t think he had, at least that was what the burglar said who broke into Mr. Fleming’s house. He was sorry the Radicals were throwing the sponge up because he believed they would have been able to beat Mr. Fleming if it came to another fight. (Hear, hear.) Mr. Clegg concluded by urging the Association to do its best on Mr. Fison’s behalf, and not to imagine as they had done at the last election, that it was a foregone conclusion. The toast was enthusiastically accorded.

The Chairman responded. After acknowledging the toast he said he was proud to think that few Conservative Associations could show such a growth since their establishment as theirs could. He thought there was at present a special need why they should have a strong and energetic Association, because they were entering upon a political crisis. (Hear, hear.) Mr. Gladstone’s last speech before retirement, instead of being directed towards attempting to promote good feeling between the political parties, had been an attempt to promote strife and disagreement between the country and the House of Lords. In the House of Lords they had the greatest safeguard possible against revolutionary legislation and even revolution itself, and he supposed Mr. Gladstone had his knife into the House of Lords because they threw over the Home Rule Bill. (Hear, hear.) They had not much to look forward to with Lord Rosebery. It seemed to him that it was identically the same firm doing the same business, but under different management. (Laughter, and hear, hear.) The Liberal party was still bullied and forced to obey the Irish party, and he might say the firm was now in a terrible state of bankruptcy, and before long would have to meet its creditors—(laughter)—and he regretted very much that they were creditors of the firm and he thought there would be very little in the pound for them. (Laughter.) In conclusion, Mr. Walker strongly urged them to rally round the candidate who had been selected to fight the constituency. He was undoubtedly a good man who had the courage of his own convictions, and he would like to see the Conisborough Conservative Association do its part towards returning him to Parliament.

Mr. R. H. Sharp moved a vote of confidence in the Unionist leaders. Speaking in the face of constant interruption he criticised keenly the policy of the Government, and compared it with the policy of the Unionist party when in office. He firmly believed that considering the best interests of themselves personally, and socially, and considering the best interests of the country collectively, such interests would be best served by the party of principles rather than the party of promise and finesse, the policy which had been practised by Mr. Gladstone ever since 1894. They could not afford to be governed by a Government which depended for its very existence upon the sworn enemies of England, and he had every confidence in Lord Salisbury and his supporters who, when in office, had the confidence of all Englishmen and also of foreign countries, a fact that was of itself of the highest importance to the nation as a commercial country. (Hear, hear.)

Mr. S. Whitfield seconded the vote in a characteristic speech. He said he was not an up-to-date politician, because he did not take his instruction either from a ranting Radical or a stupid old Tory. (Laughter.) It was an old woman who had taught him the principles upon which his politics were founded. (Laughter.) She said to him: “Never tell a lie, don’t touch anything that doesn’t belong to you, look everybody straight in the face, and take your luck”—(laughter)—and that was what he always had done. His opinion about both political parties was that both were bankrupt. (A laugh.) Both had a lot of dishonoured bills. (Laughter.) Politically speaking, he should estimate the Radicals worth about 2s. 6d. in the pound and would give the Conservative party credit for about 12s. 6d. in the pound. (Laughter.) The Chairman: It is very satisfactory nowadays when you can get 12s. 6d. in the pound. (Laughter.)

Mr. Whitfield, continuing, said the Grand Old Man had told them they must abolish the House of Lords, and yet his very last act was to send three more peers to swell the number there. What confidence could they have in his declarations after that?—A Voice: What confidence can we have in you? (Laughter.)—Mr. Whitfield: Shut up, will ’er? I’ll have a go at thee to-morrow. (Loud laughter.)

Continuing, Mr. Whitfield said he was not prepared to altogether decry the Grand Old Man himself. While they had diseases they must try to find remedies, and he granted that the Grand Old Man had been a grand antidote to the action of the aristocracy in the past. But nowadays things were altered, and he had just as much faith in the aristocracy as he had in the democracy and no more. (Laughter and interruption.)—Mr. Whitfield: Shut up, will ’er? Continuing, the speaker said he was not an advocate of the bloated aristocracy, but he infinitely preferred them to the plutocracy. (Hear, hear.) They had had a taste of plutocracy only lately. What had they gone through in the past year? They had gone through lock-outs and riots which were caused by the policy of the plutocrats who were now trying to shirk out of paying for them. He never heard of bloated aristocrats trying to do that. (Hear, hear.) History would tell them how the Lords had obtained their distinctions. Some of them got into the House of Lords through their bravery, some through their diplomacy, a good many by treachery—(laughter)—a lot of them by debauchery, and even more by toadyism and sycophancy. He believed in a second chamber, especially seeing what a set of hungry, invertebrate lot of noodles they had in the House of Commons. (Loud laughter.)

Before they abolished the House of Lords he wanted to know what the substitute would be. He wanted to know what it was to be—whether it would be the Lords or Commons—and how much difference there was between the Lords and Commons he would show them. He looked upon them as he would look upon a rookery. (Laughter.) The Lords were the early-fledged birds who had got the worms, and the others were cawing for them. (Loud laughter.) He did not want to be robbed by some one richer than himself, and he did not want to be robbed by anybody poorer than himself. The Liberal party wanted to rob everybody that possessed what they didn’t. (Laughter.)

He would deal with some of the cranks of the Liberal party. He thought Home Rule had been discussed while they were satisfied with it. Ireland was better off than England, and had been for years. Ireland had more liberty and less taxation and more than her proportion of representation. It had nothing to grumble about, everything to be thankful for, and unless the Irish were satisfied it was time to begin to take something away from them. (Hear, hear.) That about finished up the argument.—A Voice: I don’t think it does.—Mr. Whitfield: Wilt ’er shut up? I’ll settle you to-morrow. (Laughter.)

Continuing, Mr. Whitfield said that another crank of the Liberal party was local option. He thought that would be a desirable question for such like chaps as were interrupting—(laughter)—but as to forcing independent and honest men to accept it he thought it would be cruelty. (Hear, hear.) He was a local optionist of this sort, he would have it with equity.—A Voice: Let’s have it with some booze. (Laughter.)—Proceeding, Mr. Whitfield said they would also have local option with justice if they had it at all. What had been the custom for ages? The legislature of the country had encouraged those ends of people to put their little all into building and converting buildings for this purpose, and to go and abolish them without compensation, irrespective of character, would be rank robbery and thieving.

What had they done in the way of reduction of licenses? He could remember the time when every dog-fighter or brothel keeper could obtain a license by paying £3 3s., and when ale was sold at door after door. That was done simply for the plunder obtained from people living there. Did they say, at the time when all that was to be altered, “Now, not another license shall be granted, but as new districts and neighbourhoods develop we will transfer these licenses into the new districts?” They did not do so, worse luck. If they had no injustice would have been done. It was a fair principle, and was adopted in that admirable scheme of compensation which Mr. Goschen introduced, but which he regretted was not adopted, and by means of which the trade could have been regulated without any incubus falling on the country.

In that very parish within the last year there had been a license granted to the Denaby Main Company. That was tantamount to giving £5,000 to the Denaby Main Company. (Hear, hear.) It was a frowning one so that Mr. Chambers and his colleagues could shut up three or four more. They heard a lot about the ruin worked by a public-house, but where there was one man ruined by his wife getting a few drops of gin the spring fashions in the gee-gaw shops were the ruin of many a man. (Laughter and applause.)

There was another crank of the Radicals. Paid members. He did not believe in it. If men were ambitious to seek office, let them keep themselves. If they could not afford to live when they got there, they could not afford to go, and they could not afford to be honest when they got there. (Hear, hear.) Suppose some of them went to Parliament, and they paid them. What would become of them if they lost that job? (Laughter.) There would be nothing for them but the streets and the crossing sweeper’s broom. (Laughter.)

It was his opinion that the Shirley family was ruined by ambition, and Jabez had ruined thousands by his ambition, and now they were trying it on with Fleming. One man one vote was another of their cranks. Well, he thought that every man of mature age should have a vote. Why did the Small Tenements Act come into operation? Why simply because a number of men would not pay their rates, it was left to working men to pay them. There were thousands in the country who would claim a vote and would not care for the country, and would fleece the landlord and the grocer, and would even rob an old widow out of lodging money. (Laughter.) That sort of man must not have a vote. (Hear, hear.)

Concluding, he said that in their own little village he could show them a perfect reflex of the House of Commons. They had agrarians, and boycotters, and coercionists, and moonlighters. (Laughter.) There were a lot of dissenters who were trying to rob the old building across the road, and when the gas was introduced, the gas lighters had even come down on the lonely farmhouse. (Laughter.) He had an utter abhorrence of such a policy as that, and he had not the least doubt that all honest Conservatives in Conisborough hated it as well.

Mr. Potts, of Leeds, supported the vote, which was carried unanimously.

The health of the Chairman was proposed by Mr. W. W. Norwood and heartily drunk, Mr. Walker suitably responding.—Mr. Price proposed the “Town and Trade,” to which Mr. Saville responded.—Mr. Gillott proposed a vote of thanks to Mrs. Gibson, the hostess, and this was carried unanimously, Mrs. Gibson returning thanks.

Songs were sung during the evening by Mr. Peverelli, who sang “Jeanie’s Silvery Brown,” “The Hard-up Society,” by Mr. Saville, “The Thorn,” and “The Anchor’s Weighed,” by Mr. Price, “Remember or Forget,” and Mr. W. W. Norwood “Killaloe.”

The proceedings, which terminated at eleven o’clock, were of the most harmonious character until the conclusion.